Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
