Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
