I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
