this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
