I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
