we're blogging at a bar
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
But break dance skills will only take you so far
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Randomize
