3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Randomize
