You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
