My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
she told me i tasted like america
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize