love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
