Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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