i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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