Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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