I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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