so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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