I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
