I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
