I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
the day after is always just damage control
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
