Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
