I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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