Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
