my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Randomize
