That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
i believe in u and ur pee
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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