Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
