what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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