I'm eating all of the evidence.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
