We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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