oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize