I can tuck mytits in my pants
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
We're too hungover to prance.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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