someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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