I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Randomize
