i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
