you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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