It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
