just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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