The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
