We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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