So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
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