dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
