Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
