Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
