i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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