I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Michael Bay diarrhea
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
