Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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