SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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