Whod you bang
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize