She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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