She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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