Do vagina's smell?
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize