butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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