So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
she told me i tasted like america
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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