just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
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